Did you miss me? I’m back, and with me I bring my views on this latest social media phenomenon.

So, for anyone living under a rock, the Ice Bucket Challenge is where you throw a bucket of ice water over your head, film it, and challenge other people. Oh, and also somewhere along the line you donate to some money to research into a cure for ALS (also known as Lou Gehrig’s Disease, or Motor Neurone Disease). It looks a bit like this.
Unlike the “no make-up selfie“, this trend, which as shown in the video has been taken on by many high-profile celebrities across the world, does at least have some relevance to the cause. Apparently, being drenched in Ice Water simulates some of the sensations of ALS, so by dunking yourself in ice-water it’s a bit of showing solidarity, as well as giving to charity. I have no idea if this is true, it’s just a thing I heard. But charity.

And don’t get me wrong, I’m all for that. 

Today, I was informed by social media that the ALS campaign has raised over $50 million dollars.

And again, don’t get me wrong, because I really am all for that.

So, what’s the issue? Well, please excuse the terms I’m about to use, because they are slightly strong, but I feel like they are a good way of making the point. $50 million dollars is an amazing amount, and will feed into a lot of amazing research into ALS. But that same $50 million could be absolutely instrumental in wiping out a range of diseases which ravage the developing world. Their cures are already known, and vaccinations cost hardly anything, but instead we do no make-up selfies, or dump water over ourselves, to raise money for research into “white” diseases.

This is what I was apologising for just now. It seems to me that social media is great at funding huge projects when it’s a sob story of a sad white person. Let’s get the research done so less people die of cancer. That’d be great. But why can’t we also use all that fundraising impetus to feed and cure the world?  Cause, plenty of not-white people would also struggle with cancer if they lived that long. For decades people have been trying to incite fundraising towards these issues in the developing world, and it’s less effective because it’s a “not-white-people” problem. Sorry again, these are very bare statements.

Now, the fundamental part of this all is not the money thing, it’s the time thing. I am such a huge fan of the effort people have put into the ALS campaign, as I was (to some extent) with the selfie-for-cancer campaign, because I think having a generous soul is the best thing in the world. The thing is, to wipe a deadly disease off the map is a million times easier if everyone can be vaccinated at once. Which is why if there was a campaign to raise money for, say, the GAVI campaign which delivers life-saving vaccinations to children across the globe, that $50 million could do some amazing, instant good because of being concentrated over a short space of time.

I do not suggest that anyone chooses not to donate to the ALS campaign, or any other charitable campaign which means something to you. However, if you do want your contribution to be activism, not slacktivism (new favourite word), please consider donating to a cause which will have an immediate benefit humanitarian benefit, as well as those which will one day bring about vital cures.

This hasn’t been very well written (I’m tired), so I’ll try and come back to it, but basically, don’t forget that while the search for a cure to cancer is so important, the destruction of death by something so simple to cure as diarrhea is really important as well. If you are
lucky enough to be in a position to do so, please consider a donation towards both.

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EDIT:  Also freerice.com. Go there and do the things. Now. It’s going on my HabitRPG.

Ok, I’m already sorry. I slightly hate the phrase “check your privilege”. It’s used so frequently on the internet in entirely the wrong contexts.

That being said, I’ve noticed this article being bandied around several times recently. It’s called “18 Things Females Seem To Not Understand (Because, Female Privilege)” which admittedly is a poor place to start – I can’t think of a better way to rile up the feminists of the internet than be referring to my entire sex as “females” (regardless of how accurate that may be). It was followed up by this article, entitled “18 Reasons Why The Concept Of “Female Privilege” Is Insane”.

Now, let me be entirely controversial. I agree with both pieces.

The first lists a range of things which the writer considers to be “female privilege”, and honestly, they are. Just because many of them have counterpoints which highlight why feminism is still a just and worthy cause, doesn’t mean that any woman shouldn’t check her privilege *shudder* when using any of these points to justify herself in a given situation. The counter-argument article is just listing those valid counterpoints, not really challenging whether or not the original ideas are examples of female privilege.

Here’s what it comes down to. These are two lists which catalogue either stereotypes, or sad statistics. It is a terrible thing that we live in a world where so many women are subject to rape. It’s also terrible that so many men are denied access to their children due to a system which assumes that a mother is a more suitable guardian. It is deplorable that women who get drunk and have sex are automatically branded as ‘sluts’, and it’s as bad that men in the same position are branded ‘rapists’. None of these things are an excuse for the rampant misogyny and misandry which invariably follows.

I think it is fair to say that if these two articles highlight anything, it’s that in a modern world where we can be discursive and challenge issues related to gender inequality, we should all be checking our privilege all of the time.

Every time a stereotype is bandied around by an internet activist they need to check their internet activist privilege – because if anything we should be recognising that for every stereotype and every statistic there will be a valid counterpoint. Those of us lucky enough to sit around spouting our views on the internet are almost always the people who have the western, developed world privilege of living in a society where individuals are being recognised as individuals, not confined to exclusivist views related to their race, gender, sexuality and religion. So let’s stop with the lists insisting that generalised groups check their privilege. If you think you have a right to come out with something like that, it’s your own privilege you need to be checking.

…and with that, she checked her mouthy-internet-feminist-cum-egalitarian privilege, decided she was all good, and published her post. 

So I am currently watching the Channel 4 show “Child Genius”, which is a documentary following some of the children involved in Mensa’s “Child Genius of the Year” competition. I used to watch Child of Our Time with Professor Robert Winston, following a group of children born in the year 2000 to see how they progressed, and I thought this might be somewhat similar.

I wasn’t wrong, but if there is one thing I have learnt across the two episodes of “Child Genius” it is that while there are plenty of genius children about the place, there are equally as many awful parents out there.

Now, a quick disclaimer: I do not have kids, I don’t have may friends with kids, I don’t have nieces and nephews, I don’t have any kind of child psychology qualifications, or any other childcare qualifications. 

Disclaimer out of the way, I’m sure that anyone watching the program will know I’m talking about one set of parents in particular: Shoshanna and Sasha, who’s child is Aliyah. Now, I know that they are both child psychologists or whatever, but there is a damn good reason most people don’t parent their children specifically to win competitions. The thing which distresses me about their parenting style, which for the uninitiated involves her revising at all hours of the day, having family meetings which include an agenda and minutes, and refusing to indulge in really any childhood enjoyment at all.

Now, lets take a step back. These are people who insist their parenting is the best way, yet Shoshanna happily comes out with such quotes as “I don’t think I could parent without neurolinguistic programming”. If you’re worrying about these things, frankly, it’s no wonder that your parenting sucks. Most parents don’t go in with any kind of expertise, and no matter how many times this ridiculous woman insists that most people make a poor job of parenting, the majority decidedly prove her wrong. It makes me sad to watch Aliyah because despite having parents who are psychologists, she’ll need therapy at some point to deal with the scars from their overly radical efforts to make her into a genius.

However, even the complete barmyness of Shoshanna and Sasha does not compare to the sheer terrible parenting of one of the fathers, who had two kids involved, Hazelle and 8-year old Tudor. Let me just say that again…8-year old. After the child buckled slightly in the competition (not even enough to forfeit his place) the father’s response was to openly and in front of the kids describe how disappointed he was, and how maybe he’d not raised the children he thought he had. 

Programs like this are obviously designed to highlight different parenting styles, and to be somewhat controversial to boost ratings, but as I mentioned in my post about America’s Got Talent a few weeks ago, putting these kids on TV and exposing their parent’s flawed methods is unfair. I’m a huge fan of developing and celebrating gifted children, but please, World, this is not the way. Let’s stop now.

If you are graduating or attending a graduation at the University of Leeds in the next few weeks, and are planning on wearing a white dress or skirt, please do the world a favour and wear either nude or white underwear.

I know you think that your dress is different because it cost more money or you double checked in the mirror before you left.

It’s not.

Everyone can see your knickers.

This concludes this Public Service Announcement from SallyTalks.